Well, its exactly 7 years to the week since I last spent time in Parkside – and clearly my time was up.
Got here on Monday afternoon expecting to have my 4th radiotherapy session with Hawksey, followed by an MRI on my lower back to work out why we'd had to call the ambulance out on Sunday – and I haven't made it home since then…
Had a hideous screaming incident on the radiotherapy bed – the moulded 'beanbag' I have to lie on had a very unfortunate ridge just where the pain in my lumbar region is – resulting in me being lowered very slowly onto it by 2 very nice radiology people – and me then screaming my head off as back touched ridge. Poor H came legging id down the corridor at the (getting all too familiar) sound of his wife screaming – and I was carefully helped off t bed (no treatment given) into the consulting room then.
Ensued a discussion around my imminent MRI – was given a hefty dose of oral morphine – which I then followed with an extra half dose as just was;t feeling confident that it would knock me out enough for the Mri.
And how right I was – I entered the MRI suite at 4.30pm and did;t leave it till 7pm. No, sadly that is not a typo.
Tried initially to lie down – huge screaming about 5cm from back reaching the bed – just could not get down flat.
In the next 2.5 hours `9yes, can you believe it 2.5 bloody hours) various other people came into the room and asked me to try again – resulting in 6 bouts of screaming, me getting hugely upset (if you've ever had back pain you'll know the sharp white pain that it emanates) and the most ludicrous round and round discussion of 'please get me some painkillers so I can have the MRI – we desperately need to know what's wrong with my back' / 'well, you've had the max dose of morphine' / 'well, its not working, you can see I am in screaming pain, there must be something else' / 'no, you've had the max dose – would you prefer us to use a hoist to get you onto either the stretcher or the wheelchair' / 'no because I can't even move a foot right now without screaming – there HAS to be something else – what do you normally do with people who have back injuries and can't lie flat' / 'oh I don't thing that's ever happened. Would you like to try again?' / 'No because I have now been clinging to the side of the bed for 2.5 hours, I am shaking with pain' .. ands it went on.
'Why can't you give me the gas & air I had yesterday when the paramedics came? That worked.'
"Because we haven;t got any. Oh actually, we have but its on a different floor / Well, yes we could get it up to this floor but the lead isn't long enough. Because you are on an MRI scanner (and the M stands for Magnetic) we'd need a long tube as the bottle can't come through the door or it will stick to the machine' – I swear, you couldn't make up anything more Fawlty Towers, just all sadly with none of the laughs for me or poor H who was desperately trying to find a solution.
Ended up with the (crappy) locus registrar actually calling an ambulance from St George's (yes, we were already in a hospital – Parkside – but they could;t handle it) and the Parkside CEO spotting the NHS machine in her car park. She appeared – livid – and within seconds the wonderful Charlotte Rayner arrived (A chest specialist who I've seen before, also a hockey player) and within 10 minutes I was off the MRI and in an Oncology room. My how I've missed the 3rd floor these last 7 years – not.
Since then, its been mostly good though hugely frustrating. 'I still in meeting – will call soon as can x need an MRI scan' / well, your back's not stable enough for you to lie down (true)'. Waited till Wed and was all set to be scanned in a cloud of painkillers when I had a shower, tried to turn off the tap, got burnt by the very, very hot water and had to leap to the back of the shower cubicle as I tried to turn the hot into cold water. Resulting in? Yep, me going back to square one as I re-hurt my back, having to jump to safety.
Bollocks, bollocks, bollocks. Spent last night feeling absolutely dreadful and very sick with poor H sitting by my side, looking terribly worried. The only upside is that I managed to have a standing x ray yesterday which hopefully will give some limited guidance on what's wrong and there is a chance they will be able to treat me today. Though am not totally confident as that's why I was planned in for the MRI. Here's hoping, anyway.
Cathy then arrived from Holland last night as she had always been scheduled to pick up Mum and take her back to Holland for one of our 2 week respite breaks. She will be appearing here shortly I reckon and I will then have to ring Mum back at our house and pretend I am away on an unexpected bit of work, as don't think I will be getting out of here before they fly tomorrow morning. Bugger bugger bugger as well as bollocks.
Will update when I know more. Am hoping for some direction from the x-ray. If not, there is a possibility I will be transferred to the Atkinson Morley at St George's for the MRI as they can manage people who can't lie down/still with anaesthesia there.
Oh yes, and its now only 16 days till we are due to fly on our big holiday to Barbados, Martinique and the Grenadines with J&R. I so, so, so want to be able to go and not to be the case of the whole thing being bloody cancelled. But time is ticking…
We will see. More later.
S x