SNOT – where the bloody hell does it all come from and why doesn't it behave like anything else in life?
How can something you blow out of your nose one minute, magically reappear within seconds up your raw hooter again, like a bloody rabbit from a hat?
And how can it invisibly travel at warp speed through your internal tubes, so that the snot that was one moment in your lungs is now in your nose, then in the tissue…. and then miraculaously back on your chest again. Its the Houdini of bodily liquids, the shapeshifter of glutinous masses, the persistent pop-up store in the high street of human health…
And how come if you lie down in bed you cough your guts up, but if you sit up its not so bad? Do we actually have a hidden 'weeble' inside us (the one that wobbles but won't fall down), which rebalances the distribution of snot, and can turn it from evil and splutter-inducing, to neutral and sedentary depending on whether we're horizontal or vertical??? Is it a governmental plot to force us to work more: 'Stay upright and focused and you won't cough, but dare to take a rest and I'll blow your head off with explosive mucus'???
Unexplained and unwanted. Unwelcome and unpleasant. Unpopular and under my nose.
One cough and vast quanities of gross frogspawn like stuff up for sale. One previous careless owner. Apply here.
Sx