Brace yourselves for this one, dear readers…..
Imagine the scene:
Just this very morning.
Me, having arranged a long overdue visit for a Mum and I to go see my 96 year old Aunt Ellen.
Who is therefore Mum’s sister in law.
And who, unfortunately, lives bloody miles away in Loughton, Essex.
So, there we were.
Driving in shag awful traffic to try and get there for 10.30am coffee
Knocking off all the London landmarks one by one at a snail’s pace – the Shard, Tower Bridge, Blackwell Tunnel, Limehouse Link, etc etc.
Mum, snugly secured in my passenger seat.
And me, chatting away at her, in the vain hope of stimulating some conversation.
Until, at last, we were finally in Loughton High Street.
‘Only 5 minutes to go, Mum’ blathered I.
Not much response.
So I carried on. ‘I’m glad we’re almost there. That’s taken ages. I could do with a wee’.
At which, Mum perked up hugely and turned to me, beaming away, as she replied:
‘I’M HAVING ONE NOW’!!!!
Man alive, that’s just what you want to hear, from the person sitting, fully clothed, right next to you.
Lucky, lucky, lucky me, I thought, as I mentally reached for the Dettol Spray x