Sleepless in Saigon

Didn't they (nearly) make a film about this once??

Here I am, sitting in a distinctly beige bedroom that could be pretty much anywhere. Having decided that it was too late to order room service – we were given precisely two prawns and some mini-micro Oompa Loompa sized asparagus on the plane – I have just scoffed the inevitable bag of in-room crisps which were somewhere between Asian garlic and Equine toe nails flavour. Not exactly good for the diet, sigh..

Is it just me, or do hotels go out of their way to make it IMPOSSIBLE to turn the bloody lights on and off in your room?! Have just hauled the duty manager up here (amusingly called Dong) who seemed to think I was insane for actually trying the on/off switches on the lights themselves, when there was a perfectly useable, but utterly invisible, hidden panel on the coffee table. Silly, silly 'durr, so 20th century' me.

And I had to laugh (almost) when transitting through Bangkok earlier and the desk to get my second boarding pass from was a full 1050 metres from where I'd started. With every metre counting when you're humping a dolly bag, latop case and a ridiculous long poster tube, with the end popping off to spew out said poster every 20 yards or so. Not sure it makes the ludicrous distance any better when they sign post every 200 yards, then get you to queue in the wrong line and then send you all the way back the 1050 yards, and some, to the actual gate. Serves me right for having a code share ticket with Scandinavian Airways – not entirely logical to get to Vietnam with the longlegged blonde hurdy-gurdies of the world.

And did also have a brief 'aaarrrggghhhh moment – can't believe I'm admitting to this – when I popped into the loo and was switching on my mobile and blackberry, multi-tasking as you do, only to then drop my bleddy phone and have it shoot out under the loo door. Momentary panic! What to do first? How to get door open past wheelie suitcase without losing dignity? Or phone?… Ah the luxurious joys of international executive travel… not.

So – hoping that tonight may offer a few hours kip before the workshop (although the check-in lady shaking her head saying 'no, no meetings here tomorrow' didn't exactly bode well for a smooth start) – and wishing y'all a good morning, afternoon, evening or night, wherever you are. The Ho Chi Minx x