All a bit pickledy

Sorry for distinct lack of posts of late - it's all been a bit super manic.

Since Mum got stuck in the tub a few weeks ago, she's got worse and worse. I hadn't really put two and two together that:

Getting Stuck in Bath =

Loss of Confidence =

No desire to Leave the Flat =

Loss of Ability to Walk as going to the loo to the sofa isn't enough exercise

= Likely to Fall Over as Muscles Wasting Unbelievably Fast

= Mum fell this Saturday and hurt her back.

So not only had the lightning dash to see her on Sat morning at 7am, but also really worried about whether she will pick up again or if this is the start of a very bad decline. One of those great times when you wish you could read the future and thefore make the best decisions rather than worrying that whatever you're doing isn't the right call!

Went round on Mon eve and put her to bed and felt TERRIBLE for leaving a frightened old lady tucked up on her own. She'd actually got in, wearing her day clothes at 6pm, which isn't a great sign.

So went again yesterday and discovered that Mum hadn't eaten anything from her – full – fridge apart from 2 mince pies, in the past 48 hours. Oh god, alarm bells a gogo. This hasn't happened before, she's normally pretty good at heating up ready meals and bits and making her own sandwiches for a light lunch. And there seem to suddenly be a lot of 'this hasn't happened before' moments, way more than usual, whether its her not emptying the washing machine (clothes go weird when you leave them for days in there) or refusing to go to church even though she was being picked up by her friends as usual, all not good things to be happening.

Anyway, last night I made her have most of a cottage pie, literally forcing her to eat 'just a few spoonfuls more' to try and get something hot & nutritious on board.

And was so close to getting the last piece of the Care puzzle into place as was meant to be meeting her – hopefully – new daily care lady yesterday evening too, but of course this got cancelled with 45 minutes notice and I'm still waiting to hear when they can come again so I can be there for introductions and a briefing, and they can then crack on. Idea is that this woman – Karen – will come every week day and do things from taking mum for a walk, to washing up, helping with the bath etc. Basically, as they said to me, to 'be another You'. Which would be so good as I feel crap that I'm not doing enough and 'another Me' would indeed help make sure more angles are covered an dgive us a weeny bit of breathing space too.

H and I are also talking about Mum moving in with us at Christmas. Andbless him, it was actually H's suggestion, what a good man I have married. As soon as we actually have a guest room up and running again (not stuffed to the rafters with all our furniture from downstairs) I am going to bring her over for at least a week over Christmas to see how it goes, unless she does make a miraculous recovery in the next few weeks.

Never thoguht we would, but it's the only thing thast feels right (although it fills me with horror at the prospect of switching all the different care agencies I've finally go into place with Kingston Council, over to Merton! Aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh).

So, sorry for lack of comms on here, feel am spending every spare second either with Mum or trying to get our home one step nearer being able to be occupied for Christmas. Oh yes,m and working for a living too! At the moment, we are just going to be done in time, and Mr H is all over the builders like a rash and trying to juggle a lot and sod's law says at least a few things are going to go tits up (so far only the glass splashback is post-Xmas and that's fine) – I'm more worried about Mr Oven and Mrs Flooring being there in time for Le Turkey and Les Festive Cocktails.

So much Thurs love to you all out there – off tonight to say a farewll to Sophie my RAF chum who is being posted to Afghanistan this weekend for 4 months and will be at Camp Bastion, so huge good wishes to her and to us all.

Sx