So then, Mr H the king of nice negotiators finally snared a satisfying 60% off the super posh room rates at Huvafen Fushi so I find myself typing this on his iPad, yes still mourning mine, on the lower sun deck of a massively nobby posh giant water villa on stilts in the ever gorgeous Indian Ocean. Woo hoo!
A villa which is long enough to run whooping through, which I did. And which has a monster bed and high ceilings robust enough for a fat bird to bounce on, which I did. A glass floor panel you can watch the underwater world with, where we've seen bugger all so far. A champers welcome bucket, with a usual price tag of 240 bucks which shows how mad this world is – its not worth a tenth of that but i guess the russians and japanese dont blink an eye at it, ay carumba. A jacuzzi you can drink champers in overlooking the lagoon, which we did. And a private outdoor deck pool big enough to throw yourself into naked, which my newly naturist hubby seems to like to do.
It's all a bit swanky wanky but I have to say, why the hell not?
They've been very lovely here so far, have had a complimentary 'sunset surprise' – plonked on two giant beanbags with canapés and champers, plus a hastily arranged mai tai via the golf buggy man for me. And a freebie massage with a nice Thai girl who laughed at me trying to impress her with my counting in Thai and love of fish sauce.
Have been snorkelling off our back deck, and got massive result on first foray when we finally saw the elusive Myrtle the turtle, as well as two big rays flashing past us, plus a small shark as we headed back in. Ironic that we then buckled and coughed up for a boat dive yesterday, thinking we can't come all the way here and not dive, only to surface an hour later having seen one big rock, lots of tiddly fish and what might have been a lion fish's mane hiding under a dark rock ledge, and not a sausage more! just goes to show the free wonderful world of snorkelling often comes up trumps more than squeezing yourself into a rubber fatsuit.
Spent yesterday eve watching the annual staff footy final, a feisty sand pitch event where they had 10 ball boys diving into the sea around the pitch every time the ball inevitably went in. Then on to watch the stingray feeding, where about 8 huge rays come flopping to the beach edge waiting for the marine biologist lady to give them fish slops from the kitchen. All pile onto each other and end up half beached trying to get their share, like a vast wobbly pile of glossy grey beige pancakes with eyes slithering on a sandy plate, lovely.
And now lying around like a lazy old moose digesting the ludicrous amount we packed away at breakfast, yes the only meal included in our B and B package, so one we clearly spend hours at, barely leaving an unchewed tablecloth behind in our wake. Mostly it goes like this:
Sit down
Tea for me, coffee for H
Visit the juice man, get apple, pineapple and ginger freshly squeezed
Have some sushi and sashimi, yes lorra lorra Asians here
Have the curry, today's is reef fish plus a side of Dahl and rice
Then have the cold salami, Parmesan and smoked salmon, with of course cucumber to make it healthy and toast to make it not
Go back to juice man, this time having mango, passion frui and lime, mmmm
pick at H's croque Madame with creamy cheese mushrooms in a sauce redolent of french brasseries at night, that surely goes straight to your arteries
Try the sausage but remember yet again that they're usually rubbish abroad, so finish off with bacon and toast instead
Oh yes and look at the muesli and nuts section and think must try to add that in tomorrow, funny how it always somehow falls off the list….
And then it's just twiglets till supper….
In the meantime I have managed to get all the dining and bar menus from the manager and am happily proof reading and editing them all. 'Eggs in Style' for breakfast, what the hell is that? Have got as far as the Gin page and am saving the rest of the cocktail list for a special treat later.
So, it may be posh but all you really need is a diet coke and some menus, and all is gooooooooooooood.
Happy to see the sun is finally showing his face at home, we get back Mon eve so here's hoping it continues.
Hope you're having a marv weekend, see you soon! S x x